Beauty Explained

The friend request from some guy I did not know made it through my Facebook filter. He only requested a reciprocal ‘friending,’ so I thought . . . Okay. I’ll confirm this person’s request. Maybe he wants to know about my newest book.

Click. Accept. Then came his first post. “You are so-o-o-o beautiful.”

maroon-colored flowers blooming and budding, dark background


Whether or not this was a real person, an AI impersonation, or a bot — Facebook did not allow me enough space to reply. So I decided to vent on this week’s blog post and hopefully teach this guy and others out there something valuable.

His statement was obviously a response about my profile headshot which I attribute to a gifted photographer and a skilled makeup artist. It is placed on my Facebook page to help promote my books and build my brand. But it is not a reflection of how I ascertain beauty.

In fact, I believe the most beautiful women are mature, with an inner glow that comes from an eternal source. A chorus from my high school years explains this type of beauty in its title, “Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me.”

This type of inner beauty cannot be determined by a profile picture. It has to be matured and nurtured throughout the years, often through difficult trials and a commitment to grow faith in spite of turmoil.

In today’s world, temporary beauty is identified by celebrity status, the perfect hairdo, and the size four dress. Yet women know lasting beauty involves utilizing our gifts, developing self-confidence, and using our voices to speak our truth.

Whether we’re stay-at-home moms or CEO’s in top corporations, beauty is determined more by WHO we are rather than by how we look. And that is the beauty that lasts.

True beauty is reflected in the fresh dewdrop on a red rose, the turquoise and coral swirls of a sunset, or the trouble-free sparkle in a newborn’s eyes. True beauty has nothing to do with the outer visage we show each other or upload to our social media home pages.

To experience someone’s true beauty, we must be vulnerable enough to really see them. To hear them and understand the core of their being. We must reach beyond our opinions and accept the soul’s inner space. To search for that place that defines personality, heart desire, and the passion for chasing our dreams.

For men who try to use worn out pick-up lines to invite relationship, I am here to remind them their words are empty. Women of beauty seek men of honor. Guys who will not rate women on a 1-10 scale or judge them based upon age and how much collagen is in their skin.

Truly beautiful women want men who are trustworthy, whose behavior mirrors their words. Men who remain honorable throughout the years. Men who aren’t afraid to cheer for women when they lead or make more money. Men who truly listen when a woman speaks her heart, even if they disagree with her ideas.

Beauty expands when women are accepted for being the unique persons God has created them to be. Not the cultural norms pasted on magazine covers or photoshopped to attain a certain luster.

True beauty begins inside the soul and no matter what happens in the aging process — that type of beauty cannot be destroyed or diminished.

So . . . to the Facebook guy who wanted to be my ‘friend,’ this person who somehow thought I would be impressed with his overused and tired pick-up line — I have a simple response.


©2024 RJ Thesman – All Rights Reserved

Image by Wenoc/Pixabay

Check out Abigail’s story and how she discovered her true beauty in No Visible Scars.

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